Letter to a fearful mom

June 19th, 2014


I’m slightly (majorly) overwhelmed when I think about the hospital stays and surgeries and everything medically that is going to consume our lives for who knows how long.


I am confident that you can do it, —–! When you see the difference all the medical stuff makes to your sweeties, you will WANT to do it even when it’s tough. They are so worth it. I know you know this in your head, but I want you to hear it from a mom who’s been there and done that. It will be so worth all the time and expense. Tommy’s dental work still hasn’t been done due to being turned down by practices scared of the fragile bones, and let me tell you, his mouth is so bad that I don’t care what sacrifices it eventually takes to make healing happen. It will be a day of whooping and hollering rejoicing when it finally gets done.

Personally, God has His ways of sustaining us during hard times. I don’t pray for hard times to be taken away from me any more–I pray that He will keep my heart soft and pliable, because very often, for me, it would be the easiest thing in the world to get resentful and generally complain against Him. The spiritual battle doesn’t stop once your children are home, because the enemy wants to sabotage the impact your family and children will have on everyone around you into the future. Fortify yourself with the truth of the Word and keep your eyes on Jesus no matter what. Keep tossing your burdens over the fence to His side. “This one’s for You; it’s way too big for me.” I hope I’m not offending you by being preachy! I know you’re a spunky mom or you wouldn’t be doing what you’re doing, and I want you to KNOW FOR SURE you can be confident in God because He will NOT abandon you no matter how tough it gets.

I stayed [in the CHOP PICU with Katie, while fresh from Bulgaria, for] almost two weeks, two hours from home (so not an easy driving distance for Joe and our other ten children), while pumping for Verity but separated from Verity, and while it was hard, and I grieved the separation, the time we spent there was also good in so many ways. It will seem later like it went quickly.

One more note. I have learned to make the most of this life God has given me. For example, since I’m going to be in the hospital a lot, then by gum I am going to tell the story to as many people as will listen and give them the business-type cards with Katie’s before and after photos and our blog and contact info. I’m surrounded by people who care about kids and they are going to hear about exceptionally vulnerable kids who are being thrown away instead of getting desperately-needed love and help. They will never be able to say they didn’t know. I still do this every single time I’m in a new department of the hospital or meet new staff or even chat with other waiting moms with disabled kids.

And I’ve learned to appreciate the gift of good coffee.  <smile>

Please feel free to write to me about anything at any time. I’ve probably been through the emotions you’ll go through and am here to listen and encourage if you need it. We post-institutionalization special needs adoptive moms need each other for sure, and I’m so glad to have connected with you, —–.

Love and blessings,




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One Response to “Letter to a fearful mom”

  1. Amy says:

    Amen, precious friend!

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