All the work I have to do

September 15th, 2010

I was reading too far ahead in the story!  It’s one thing to go enthusiastically in search of what we can do now to help Verity learn.  It’s quite another to look down through the next dozen or so years’ worth of work and wonder how it will all fit into what we’re doing now!

Foolish child, to worry about failing at tasks your Father hasn’t even given you!

First, He encouraged my heart by saying, “…as thy days, so shall thy strength be.”

Then as Joe and I talked things over during our date night, we realized that the family has fallen into the mindset that things are normalizing, when in actuality, Verity’s feedings have been taking more time, not less.

She has been eating more, but not eating faster.  She consistently drinks four ounces at a feeding now, and that consistently takes her two hours.  The sling has become so indispensable that we ordered a second one (also found at a good discount!) to cover the time the first one needs to spend being re-shrunk in the laundry.

As life has gotten busier with the start of school, I have needed to increase my pumping time from ten up to twenty minutes every three hours, to maintain a good supply.  I draw from those two quiet pumping hours to read and write.

We’ve caused some unnecessary busyness by allowing our days to fill too full too fast.  There’s something on our calendar every day from now until the 26th.  No wonder push has been coming to shove!

I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father for reminding me that He has already given me strength to do what He wants me to do. He did not promise to help me accomplish my will, only His own.

I’m letting go of a few more things.  Asking Him to give me a quiet heart about them, to mold my will to His.  Taking it on trust that He will help me with the rest.  I’ve lived both ways.  That is the path of stress; this is the path of joy.

It really is that simple.  Not easy! But simple.

My place of lowly service, too, beneath Thy sheltering wings I see:

For all the work I have to do is done through sheltering rest in Thee.”

~A. L. Waring

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12 Responses to “All the work I have to do”

  1. Danielle M. says:

    Thank you, Susanna for that quote and scripture.  I wrote the quote on a sticky for my shelf at my desk, where I am half the day :)  I really need to rest in that.  So glad to hear that little Verity is eating more, even if it is taking longer.  What an answer to prayer isn’t it?  Praying for you all. 

  2. Susanna says:

    You’re welcome, Danielle.  The quote came to me from a dear friend who is starting her first year of hs’ing, but who is much wiser than I am in these “ways.” :)

    Oh, and Danielle, that verse is part of God’s blessing on Asher in Deut. :)

  3. Alice says:

    I had a NON-STOP day and my days seem to have become that way with the start of the new school year and a first-time five students plus a toddler :-)SO….I thought “I’ll go read Susanna’s blog and be encouraged!” And sure enough, you spoke DIRECTLY to my heart and my need. I know it was actually the Lord speaking to my heart and my need, so thank you for being His vessel. I know that is what you desire for your life, dear Susanna!

    And…I just want to contrast the photo of chubby Verity holding her bottle in contented slumber to the mental photo you painted of yourself a few months ago, hunched over Verity with an eyedropper, crying as you tried to feed her. I cannot imagine the responsibilities you have and am not trying to diminish those, but I do thank God for bringing Verity so far since then! Blessings! Alice

  4. Ilisa says:

    Wow, we are on the same page.  Thank you for giving me God’s reminders.

  5. Denise says:

    ***LOVE*** that picture!! So cute!!  So comfortable–  so perfect!!!

    LOVE IT!!

  6. Sandie says:

    I remember feeling the same way, when we had Christopher.  I went on information overload and borrowed so much trouble from the tomorrows that we are not even guarenteed to have. 
    Your family IS normalizing, you are learning a new normal.  It will always look different than the old one.  But isn’t that how it is with the birth of any child?

  7. Susanna says:

    “I just want to contrast the photo of chubby Verity holding her bottle in contented slumber to the mental photo you painted of yourself a few months ago, hunched over Verity with an eyedropper, crying as you tried to feed her. I cannot imagine the responsibilities you have and am not trying to diminish those, but I do thank God for bringing Verity so far since then!”

    Thank you for this reminder, Alice!!

    And Sandie, I can’t hear it too often!  :)

  8. Joy Horton says:

    Thank you for that picture. She is SOOOOOOOO sweet!!!! I can hardly believe that I haven’t met her (yet!) b/c of how much I love her already! She’s just precious! You are doing such an awesome job taking care of her, Susanna!

    Thank you for your post. That is SO perfectly written. my favorite part was, “He did not promise to help me accomplish my will, only His own.” BOY, did I need to hear that!!!

    Thank you for your beautiful faith that you share. I ALWAYS come away from here so refreshed and encouraged.

    May you be blessed as richly by Him as you have blessed me.

    I love you!

  9. Aunt Erma says:

    I love the picture of Verity sleeping with her bottle.   Her other pics are really cute too.   What a doll!    The Lord will enable you.   Your other children are such assets.   God bless you.

  10. Danielle M. says:

    Yes!  I love the blessings that Jacob bestows on his sons.  And since we have both an Asher and a Benjamin, those are particular favorites.  I just love the name Asher for its meaning.  When Leah said, “the women shall call me happy (or blessed)” that is exactly the way we felt about Asher when he was in the womb, and now 2.5 years later. 
    Thannks again for helping me keep my eyes on HIM!

  11. Marilyn Osborn says:

    I read this today and thought of you:
     
    God doesn’t give children with special needs to strong people; He gives children with special needs to ordinary, weak people and then gives them strength. Raising a child with Down Syndrome doesn’t TAKE a special family, it MAKES a special family.

  12. Susanna says:

    Marilyn, thank you, my friend!  I love that and put it in here:

    http://theblessingofverity.com/2010/02/living-on-encouragement/

    I can tell you with certainty–that statement is absolutely true!  The only thing that ever makes me feel discouraged in blogging is when people praise US instead of GOD.  Missing the WHOLE POINT OF THIS STORY, however kindly meant!

     

     

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