Her middle name

May 2nd, 2010

“I sought the LORD, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.  They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed.”

The older woman beamed when she saw my big belly, and told me I was blossoming!

I showed her Verity’s smile picture, and she exclaimed in amazement and admiration!

She told me that it always made her so glad to see how happy I am to be the mother of many children!

Then I told her that Verity was going to be a special baby, and explained why.

She did not respond by saying that she was sorry.

But she didn’t have to.

In spite of my shining smile and enthusiastic words, and her verbal agreement with all I was telling her, for the rest of our visit, she kept her eyes averted from mine and wore a grave expression on her face.

She said that our baby girl will be surrounded with love in our family, that she will bring joy to us, and that the biggest trouble we will face will not be from our daughter, it will be from ignorant people.

But her smile did not reappear.

And she asked if we would still want to have any more children after this one.

But do you know what?   It would have taken real effort for me to stop beaming inside and out.  Of course I didn’t try!  I know that this sweet lady just doesn’t understand. I know, because my understanding used to be right where hers is.

When I consider my grief back on February 7th, and contrast that with the unreserved joy and anticipation that is now in its place, my heart swells in awe and thankfulness at the amazing miracle that my loving Father has wrought in my understanding and my emotions.

That night, I felt as if I were in a dark pit, and cried out to Him for help.  I was right here, “Hear, O LORD, and have mercy on me; LORD, be my helper!

And from there, He has brought me here (the very next verse), “You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; you have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, to the end that my glory may sing praise to You and not be silent.  O LORD my God, I will give thanks to you forever.”

He took the truth

…the truth about Himself and the truth about Down syndrome…

…and used it to turn my fear into Joy.

Her name will be Verity Joy.

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9 Responses to “Her middle name”

  1. Shari~hotfudgecustard says:

    How wonderful!  HE is so wonderful!!!  Praise the Lord!

  2. Robin says:

    I LOVE IT!

  3. Joy Horton says:

    That is so beautiful! I love the verses — and I LOVE the reason behind her name! ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!!!! God is AWESOME!

  4. Erin says:

    I love this post, I was walking through the store reading it on my phone and you got me good… watery eyes!

  5. Tracy says:

    Susanna,  until earlier this week, I had missed all that was happening in your pregnancy and the posts you had made on Momys (I’m Tracylhl).  I don’t know how but I did.  I caught up earlier in the week.  Now as I read about sweet Verity and her middle name, I’m in tears.  You, your family, and your sweet daughter have blessed me more than you will ever know.  Thank you for sharing your heart and your Verity with all who read here.

  6. Rebecca says:

    So perfect!  :)
    Love+hugs,
    Rebecca in Alberta

  7. Shannon says:

    Beautiful name, and perfect!

  8. Laura (kidsmomofmany) says:

    How fitting a name for such a wanted and loved little girl. Perfect is the truth. Just remember that people who have not walked in your shoes have no idea. Have mercy on them for their ignorance.

  9. Colleen says:

    Oooh, I love, love, love that name!

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